Famous “Daloo3” the selfie star chimpanzee was apprehended from the Kuwait local zoo on Sunday for resisting arrest after being confronted with the serious offense of allegedly spreading the Ebola virus to 2 innocent local children according to reports from the Ministry of Health.
The investigation began when the 2 victims, who are brothers, were taken to Adan hospital for treatment of water diarrhea and violent vomiting and were put on a Pepsi and Sprite drip to aid in electrolyte absorption and stomach disinfection until their condition stabilized. Once they recovered they indicated to the hospital doctor and staff that they felt the incoming symptoms shortly after their interaction with the infected monkey after they took a selfie with him feeding them for fun as a joke. But, their parents thought that they were just lying as usual to get off school until their condition worsened to near death which prompted them to call the driver to take them to hospital.
Thanks to the valiant efforts of the Ministry of Health and the Ministry of the Interior, further investigation of this mysterious case led to the swift discovery and rapid arrest of the sick criminal monkey who was the local zoo entertainment star and often posed for selfie opportunities with fans. The Egyptian handler M.H was also arrested and referred to the relevant authorities for smuggling the infected monkey from Egypt by sedating it with powerful heroin drugs and hiding it in his underwear while passing through customs undetected. Both the animal culprit and human handler are awaiting trial and sentencing and will be scheduled to be deported back to Egypt after serving their prison stay.
It is now suspected that as many as 10 cases of Ebola that were discovered this past year were all due to this monkey but they were never verified since the source has been unknown or ruled off as foreign in nature of course since Kuwait is usually totally disease free. The zoo is currently closed down for complete animal elimination and for the bony stable renovation expected to debut in Jan 2017.
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